Local Man Opens, “Church of the Latter Day Vape”
“Vape is life, bro,” says 23-year-old Eric Daniels of Boston, Massachusetts, “I was vaping one day, and I don’t know what I was vaping,...
Congress: Republicans and Democrats Move to Create Bill Banning Women from Leaving Kitchen or Bedroo
“We think this is for the best,” says House Majority Leader, Kevin McCarthy. “The recent incidents in college sports have shown us that...
Charlotte: Local Looter and Street Criminal Explains His Reason for Participating in the Protest
Protests in Charlotte intensified yesterday as more destruction and damage has been done. But what lies at the heart of the Violence and...
Woman in Line at Starbucks Explains the Evils of Corporations
“We’re slaves to the corporatocracy,” declared Cindy Willis, 24, of Portland, Oregon, “The corporations are the ones with all the power....
“America is the Greatest Country in the World” says Patriotic Woman, “But We have More Problems Here
“Aint no country in the world better,” says Gladys Robinson, 67, of Mobile, Alabama, “But I tell you: we got more problems here than any...
Pope Francis: “Americans Need to Learn the Correct Way to Pick and Choose Which Parts of the Bible t
“Americans are puzzling to me,” said the Pope, “If they think same-sex marriage is wrong, then why do they eat lobster and wear two...
Arizona Man Lobbies Congress to Outlaw ‘Being Offended’
“I’m sick and tired of whiny, bitch-ass, p#@@ies being offended by things,” Harry Coulter, 39, of Phoenix Arizona, told the United States...
“I’m Tired of Being Called a Racist Every Time I Express My Opinion About the Blacks,” Says Disgrunt
“The blacks are the real racists here,” says Richard Hutchinson, 59, of Savannah. “Every time I express my opinion about the issues of...
US Supreme Court: 1st Amendment Actually Does Allow Americans to Say and do Whatever They Want Witho
In a landmark decision on Monday, the US Supreme Court ruled that the first Amendment of The United States Constitution prevents any US...
"It's Important that We Ignore Any Evidence that We're Wrong" Says Advocacy Group
In recent months, the archaic theory that the Earth is not an oblate spheroid, as science holds, but rather is flat has regained an...
